Achtung, Baby! Dray Fires Back!!



RIMSTING, GERMANY (UPI) - Far as far away as Germany, the aftershocks of the December 11th  grudge match between Bob Dray and Tom Francis are still being felt, as evidenced by a recent interview that the vacationing Mr. Dray provided to Ms. Ivana Fuchs of the German daily, Deutsche Allgemeine Zeitung.

In the interests of journalistic integrity, The Hosel Rocket is pleased to publish Mr. Dray's interview in its entirety, with the German to English translation provided by our very own Mr. Tee:

The true story of the last match of the year that decided the championship between Dashing Dray and Tom the Terrier.

Dashing Dray had to give Tom the Terrier seven strokes on the front and six on the back. The match came down to the final two holes with Tom the Terrier leading by five shots, setting the stage for a typical Dashing Dray heroic comeback as Tom the Terrier had broken five of his clubs and three of Dashing Dray’s in fits of frustration.

On the 17th tee, with Tom the Terrier leading by five strokes, Dashing Dray strikes a laser like shot to the pin as Tom the Terrier snaps his shot into the water. He then asks Dashing Dray for a ball, as he did not want to walk to his bag to retrieve one of how own. Dashing Dray obliged, even though he had given a sleeve of new Titleists to Tom the Terrier earlier in the round.

On the 18th tee, Dashing Dray and Tom the Terrier strike similar drives even though Tom the Terrier is snapping at Dashing Dray’s heals as he is driving. Dashing Dray strikes another laser shot, with Tom the Terrier again snapping at Dashing Dray’s heals as he is hitting the shot. The ball strikes the lollipop in the middle of the fairway and goes into the water! Then, having previously given all of his balls to Tom the Terrier, Dashing Dray was forced to ask for a a ball from his playing partner.  Dashing Dray then drops, and lashes another laser onto the green and makes five.

Tom the Terrier then hits his next shot into the water, moves closer, chunks two more of Dashing Dray’s balls into the water, and then blades his final ball over the green, where he is now laying nine.  Having witnessed the greatest collapse since the Berlin Wall fell, and being afraid Tom the Terrier would hit him with one of his remaining clubs, Dashing Dray agreed not tell anyone if Tom the Terrier agreed to pay the five dollar bet.

He did not pay, and instead bribed the editor of The Hosel Rocket to print a fallacious story in the Hosel Rocket.  That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

Dashing (Bob) Dray

In the words of Mark Twain, "there are two sides to every story, and then there's the truth". In the opinion of this editor, I don't believe we've heard the last of this story from either Bob or Tom.